September 2011
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Can someone just get me a dog for my birthday? It’s tomorrow and thanks in advance.
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Am I the only person who gets irrationally mad at scratch tickets when I don’t win?
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All these dummies try to get fit for summer, but I’m getting fit for winter. Cover that svelte bod in layers of flannels, cardigans, sweaters and hoodies. It starts today. I got my smoothie game so right. Get fit for hibernation.
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Trad Rule #88: Never date a woman who is proficient with firearms.
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Dear head, why do you weigh as much as an anvil right now?
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To anyone reading this…go see Drive. Now. Do it. Whoa, mama. I might go see it again today.
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Fingers crossed for Powerball tonight. I know it’s a long shot but I’ve got a good feeling about this one…
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50/50 chance I could vomit all over the road on this run I’m about to embark on. Here we go!
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Welp, I think I broke my spleen while lying down on the couch. It’s been fun guys.
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